I was picking my nose
and my dog walks in and stares at me. At this point, my finger is still in my nose and we stare at each other for a couple minutes. That was weird. My finger was still in my nose when he left.
you’re not allowed to like the things i like because i hate you
How do gay guys walk?
-5280: In One Direction.
Boy: Did it hurt
Girl: (sigh) did what hurt
Boy: Breaking through the earth's crust ascending from hell
Sixteen Things Calvin and Hobbes Said Better Than... →
amandaonwriting: On life’s constant little limitations Calvin: You know, Hobbes, some days even my lucky rocket ship underpants don’t help. On expectations Calvin: Everybody seeks happiness! Not me, though! That’s the difference between me and the rest of the world. Happiness isn’t good enough for me! I demand euphoria! On why we are scared of the dark Calvin: I think night time is dark so...
what the fuck
disclaimer: passive-aggressive post you think you can get sympathy from my bros? not even my friends but the people who i call my brothers. trying to use one of them to get back at me is a new fucking low.they can see right through your manipulative bullshit. who the fuck do you think you are that you try to get MY friends on YOUR side? everyone can see right through you and i don’t have...
n0-h8-m8: sometimes when I’m alone I listen to music and mouth the words dramatically and pretend I’m in a music video
Giving a guy a blowjob: mouth -> penis -> pleasure
Eating out a girl: Okay take the blue wire and overlap it with the yellow wire making sure it doesn't cross the red one. After that take all three of the wires and tie them all in a knot using only your left foot.
When people compliment my blog
if anyone ever did compliment my blog, that is
That moment when you really want to be friends...
legit: lolsofunny: BUT YOU’RE TOO DAMN SOCIALLY AWKWARD. lolsofunny:)) this one fucking person….Im usually not nervous but damn I freeze.
When i meet my celebrity crush: